“That’s great! So, have you met a guy yet? I worry about you.”
I like guys, I really do. They are cute and sexy, and usually know how to put up shelves that don’t fall down, but a relationship with one is something I’m not ready for. I’ve had boyfriends but as I get older, the less bullshit I am willing to put up with and the more I enjoy my own company, and the company of my dogs and friends. I’d like to fall in love again, someday. Not today. Today I’m gonna read, and paint, and write about feminism.
Society, including my mom, thinks life for women doesn’t really start until they get married. It’s not so easy to convince all of the women who are now divorced.
41 percent of first marriages end in divorce.
60 percent of second marriages end in divorce.
73 percent of third marriages end in divorce.
It is always amazing to me when I bring up feminism and women say, “Hell no, I don’t hate men!” Feminism has nothing whatsoever to do with the liking or disliking of men. It is the establishment of an equal place for women in society. In the workforce, in politics, and social rights.
of the past, eh? If your only knowledge of feminists is angry women
ranting that men should be eliminated from the planet, you need to get a
cup of coffee and listen to me. Because this is very important. It’s
not about opening doors, it is about money. Today, women college
graduates earn approximately 65 cents for every dollar a college
graduate man earns, working full time.
Statistics on how much women earn:
Traditional values tell us that men are the heads of households and therefore need to get raises and promotions. But in reality, 84% of custodial single parents are mothers. And 24% of those families headed by single mothers are living below the poverty level. This means millions of children are living in poverty.
If you are a woman who is taken care of and feels these issues do not affect you, all I can say is, your mantra should be THERE BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD GO I. Because anything can happen. You may find yourself single or worse, single and older, and out there with the rest of us making 40% less than men for the exact same work.
THIS is feminism - the desire for women to be valued by society every bit as much as men. If we were paid the same as men, then it wouldn’t matter if a guy didn't pick up the check.
Gender roles are socially constructed and formed through early learning patterns that are continually reinforced by both men and women. Gender roles hurt men as well as women, so it’s not just about getting men to understand, it is about educating women, too. Society pits women against one another. It says, sure you can have a great job, but you better look like a fashion model while doing it. And, if you are a woman in a powerful position, sexist jokes are to be endured, lest you start believing that you really ARE equal.
Women comprise only 20% of the Senate.
Women comprise only 17% of the House of Representatives.
And yet women comprise 50.8% of the U.S. population.
That’s approximately 7 million more women
in the United States, according to the 2011 census.
It's not that there aren’t any women in high offices, anymore than there aren't minorities in high offices. There are a token few. The day has hopefully arrived already when we all would say “this is my friend, Tanya,” rather than “my black friend, Tanya.” Feminism won't be as much of an issue when everyone - men, women, and minorities - are equally represented in high-ranking positions. Statistically right now, the vast majority of the power brokers are all rich white men in their 50s.
Princess = Daughter of a Monarch
Is giving up dedicating one’s life to finding the perfect guy to buy us stuff really taking away a girl's childhood? What if Prince Charming never comes? What if you grow up and get date raped instead? Children should have stories but ones that are empowering. One where the girl wears glitter and is a Fairy in charge of all the other fairies. Who is president of fairy land, not waiting for the boy fairy to keep her locked in a castle while he makes important, princely decisions all day long.
I like glitter and pink. Unlike society and the media would have us believe,
feminism is NOT about giving up one’s femininity. It’s about demanding
respect and fair treatment. It’s about the idea girls are bombarded
with since the time they are born to grow up and be taken care of. Can
we have equality and still wear red lipstick? Look, I spend way too
much time thinking that if my clothes looked better and my hair were
shinier, the world would value me more. And if I watch any amount of
television, these self-deprecating thoughts are reinforced. Yes, we
women need to rein in this whole physical appearance self-improvement
crap and RADICALLY love ourselves, right now, just the way we are. We
need to love and value MORE the person we are once the makeup comes off.
Think about when you were a kid. I liked playing house, too, but how much of that was trying to be like mommy, the woman who meant more to me than anything else in the world at that time? Did I really want to pretend to be baking cakes or was I just trying to emulate my mom because I thought that was what was expected of me? (Let’s see, I’m 45 now and I hate to cook. You figure it out).
Gender roles are culturally learned and change over time. Gender roles help form who we think we are, in daily life, in politics, in what we wear, how we walk, how we talk. It is our identity, and the identity of others. How wonderful would it be if children were allowed to follow their own hearts and abilities even at play? Perhaps then girls wouldn’t always be expected to take what is deemed the subservient role later in life but be treated as true equals in the workplace, both in value placed upon them as employees and in wage equity.